WHEN GOD SAYS, "NO!"

David was the greatest warrior king ever to lead the nation of Israel. Under his leadership Israel’s enemies were subdued and its borders were expanded. After years of war 2 Samuel 7:1 says that a time of peace came to Israel. In this period of tranquility David decided that he wanted to build God a temple. David was uncomfortable with living in a beautiful house while the presence of the Lord dwelt in a tent! “I dwell in a house of cedar, but the ark of God dwells in a tent” (2 Samuel 7:2).

David submitted his idea to the prophet Nathan who agreed, saying, “Go, do whatever is in your heart, for the Lord is with you” (2 Samuel 7:3). Later that night, as Nathan was trying to sleep, the Lord came to him and sternly told him to go to David and remind him that God had called him to be a shepherd to Israel and that he was not to build God a house (see 2 Samuel 7:5-7).

Both Nathan and David had been wrong. To Nathan, God said, “You go and correct what you said” and to David the word of the Lord was a very clear, “No!” There was nothing unrighteous in what David wanted to do but God still said, “No!”

Paul, Silas and Timothy were traveling together preaching the gospel and in Acts 16: 6-7 we read that Paul wanted to go into one of the provinces of Asia to minister but the Lord would not allow it. God said “no” to Paul preaching the gospel in these areas! It’s hard to believe that God would say “no” to the preaching of the gospel to the lost—but He did!

Why would God say “no” to David who wanted to honor Him by building a temple? Why would God tell Paul “no” to preaching the gospel in an area that had not yet heard the message? Why did God tell Jesus “no” in the Garden of Gethsemane, and why did God tell Paul “no” three times as he prayed for his own healing? Why does God sometimes say “no” to us? And how are we supposed to handle it?

I am fully aware that what I am about to say runs counter to some popular teaching. Some teach that if there is a promise in the Bible, then we have the right to claim it and demand that God fulfill it on our behalf. I know that Hebrews says that we are to come boldly into His presence and make our requests known—and I know that’s our privilege. But please understand that this does not mean God will give us everything we ask for. He will answer your prayer, have no doubt about that, but sometimes He will tell you “no.” 

Why would God do that?

I want to suggest at least three reasons why God says “no.” Perhaps in trying to understand these, we will understand better how to process the answer when it is “no.”

1.      God has the whole picture in view. Our ability to see the full picture is extremely limited because we live fixed in time. God doesn’t dwell in time, He lives in eternity and sees the past, the present and the future as one. God knew that both David and Paul had pure hearts and only wanted to please Him but He had other things for them to do; He had other plans and other times in mind and so He said “no.”

2.      God will say “no” because He has our best interests at heart: “You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions” (James 4:3). Asking, knocking, seeking—and God says “no.” God understands why we ask for what we do and to the impure motive He will answer in the negative. God constantly watches out for us. Sometimes the answer doesn’t come, because He knows that it would take us in the wrong direction . . . so grow up and get over it!

3.      Sometimes God will say “no” because He is a loving and good parent. “If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!” (Matthew 7:11). This passage is a comparison between us, the natural parent, and God, the perfect parent. Good parents will not say “yes” to everything their child asks for. That kind of thinking produces spoiled and immature adults who treat God as if He is a slot machine and they are going to win a prize every time they put money in the slot. God is very much into helping people mature, and mature believers have learned how to respond with grace when the answer is “no.”

God loves us so deeply and cares for us so much that sometimes He will say “no.” How we respond is indicative of how spiritually grown-up we are.